Cutting is not usually a suicide attempt, although adults commonly assume that. Ginsburg of Children's Hospital calls it "controlled pain."  These are kids with pain, sadness or trauma in their lives," he said, "and dealing with that is really hard work and really confusing and emotionally painful. Kids feel a loss of control over things that have happened in the past or over a particularly difficult relationship.

"Cutting," he said, "is a pain that they control."  Ginsburg urges parents who discover their children are cutting themselves "not to get all up in arms and terrified. They need to recognize it for what it is - it's a very strong reaction to stress and pain, and the solution is to guide someone away from this successful but worrisome coping strategy and toward a positive coping strategy."

Most children do have or can learn positive coping strategies to draw on, whether dance, sports, music, or, as Ginsburg teaches, meditation, deep breathing, or writing a journal.

"Looking at the source of pain and helping kids heal from that... that is ultimately the answer," Ginsburg said.

For Duffy of Denville, N.J., the answer was hard to come by. She endured years of hospitalizations, medication and therapy and had concluded, "There is nothing in the world that will help me."

That began to change in 1995, when she discovered Living Praise Church in Florham Park, N.J. Today, she has forgiven everyone who hurt her, has a Web site (www.endallthepain.com) and a new book about her experiences - and no need anymore to hide her scars.  "People ask all the time, 'What happened to you?' and I say, 'Years ago I had a lot of problems and as a way of coping, I used to cut my body.'" Some recoil. Others stay to talk.  "There are a lot of hurting people out there," Duffy said. "I let them know there is hope."

Philadelphia Inquirer